Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Breathing Room

I just marked my third month completely on my own, in a city I came to without knowing anyone, on the biggest, bravest, most spontaneous leap I have ever made in my overly-cautious, over-planned life. I know it's an overused cliche, but time does go so incredibly fast - and the year I initially planned on staying here is a quarter done.

I can go on and on about the pros and cons of living abroad. There is so much from back home that I miss - not the least of which are the people I love, the familiarity of home, the lifestyle I am accustomed to. But there is also a lot about being here, independent for the first time in my life, that I am learning to love.

I'm settling into a routine, finding new friends, and slowly beginning to realize that this is not an extended vacation to an exotic place - this is my real life and this is where I live now. Some days I just want to hop on the first plane back home, but some days I also wish could stay here forever. It gets so confusing that I've given up pondering on that for the moment.

I'm living my life out here one day at a time, and I am slowly becoming more comfortable doing it. For the first time in my life, I have room to breathe. Living in the moment has given me space and time to get to know myself better in ways I have never really done before. I may not have done anything drastic or even remotely adventurous, but for the first time in a very long time, I am reveling in an air thick with possibility.

I still have no solid future plans and am still in a free-fall with no clue as to when I will hit the ground. But this early on, I can say that regardless of outcome, deciding to come here and do this was a good decision and one that I do not regret.


Manggy said...

but some days I also wish could stay here forever
Really? That is quite a pleasant surprise. Not in the sense that Perth is the perfect place for you, but it means that you are very much capable of adapting to any situation and finding the joy even in new, frightening experiences. That is awesome. We're so proud of you!

Clarisse Teagen said...


Abaniko said...

I just love the free spirit in you. Enjoy your adventure!

dr_clairebear said...

@manggy: it's been a character building experience, but one i highly recommend. :) i think perth and its pace is not for everyone - this is no bustling metropolis - but for someone who gets a kick out of wide open spaces and a laid back lifestyle, it could be a slice of paradise.

@clarisse: it's hard to imagine an adult my age saying this is the first time i've experienced such freedom, but it's true! :)

@abaniko: i think i've chained me up for so long that I'm just beginning to figure myself out. but i am most definitely enjoying the adventure. :))

Panaderos said...

Reading this brought a smile to my face, my friend. I'm very happy for you. I'll leave it at that. Take care always. :)