A Port in the Storm

I recently unearthed a book by one of my favorite spiritual writers, Henri Nouwen, while I was sorting out the mess I brought home from the call room. The book, Seeds of Hope, is a collection of excerpts from his compelling body of work.

There is a prayer from that book I would like to share with all of you. It was read to us by our retreat master some years ago, and it's been a favorite of mine ever since. It is a very personal prayer of his that resonates with me right now because of where I am (or, rather, where I am not) in my spiritual journey. It's a reminder of God's constancy in the face of my own flakiness - something that I really, really need right now.

A Prayer to the God of Ebb and Flow

Dear Lord,

Today I thought of the words of Vincent Van Gogh: "It is true there is an ebb and flow but the sea remains the sea."

You are the sea. Although I experience many ups and downs in my emotions and often feel great shifts and changes in my inner life, you remain the same.

Your sameness is not the sameness of a rock, but the sameness of a faithful lover. Out of your love I came to life; by your love I am sustained; and to your love I am always called back.

There are days of sadness and days of joy; there are feelings of guilt and feelings of gratitude; there are moments of failures and moments of success; but all of them are embraced by your unwavering love.

My only real temptation is to doubt in your love, to think of myself as beyond the reach of your love, to remove myself from the healing radiance of your love. To do these things is to move into the darkness of despair.

O Lord, sea of love and goodness, let me not fear too much the storms and winds of my daily life, and let me know that there is ebb and flow, but that the sea remains the sea. Amen.